Destroy All Onions!

You’ll have noticed there’s an election coming up. Who should we be voting for?

The good news is that today I found the candidate for me – Harry Hamilton. Because he is the only candidate standing for election who is also Northern Ireland’s leading Freddy Mercury impersonator, performing for many years as Flash Harry.

Who else will have policies on the following:

• Killer Queens
• Fat bottomed girls
• Wanting to ride my bicycle
• Wanting to live forever
• Finding me somebody to love

I hope no-one stops him now, and that he’ll be the champion (my friend).

There’s something about being conservative and unionist as well, but I’m sure that’s not important.

The only problem is that he’s not standing in my constituency.

Boo! More musical impersonators for parliament.

Abba impersonators for Prime Minister!!

Things I did today I’m all pleased about:

• I got 54 mpg out of my car by driving a bit under the speed limit instead of at it (or over it).
• I cycled 15 miles, along the Comber Greenway.
• I walked 4 miles up and down Cave Hill.
• I had an Indian for tea.
• I like Saturdays.